Hard on the Knees
by AlittleGandA
Summary: One of River's experiments gets a little … out of hand. Then the real trouble starts. JayneRiver, MalInara, SimonKaylee, WashZoe.
1. Chapter 1

AN: Meet the reason we swore never to co-write again. It just kept ... growing.

Spoilers: Character deaths? What's that? I have no idea what you're talking about.

Disclaimer: If any of these guys were ours, we wouldn't be so ruttin' poor. So sad, they always tell us.

**Hard on the Knees  
>by Gatekeeper and AnitaB<strong>

**Chapter 1**

"Well, this is ... interesting."

Jayne groaned and flung an arm over his closed eyes. "Book, what the hell d'you want? I ain't on breakfast duty this week - let a man sleep another fifteen minutes."

"I can see why you might need it."

By this point, old self-preserving instincts had kicked in, finally picking up the implied threat of death in the Shepherd's voice. Curious now (with his cooking, they should be grateful he wasn't in the kitchen) he lifted an arm up and cocked one eye open, blurry eyes finally focusing on the figure at the foot of the bed. After a moment, something else kicked in. "Hey, what happened to all my stuff?"

"I would guess that it's still in your room," Book clipped out, arms folded and his expression that of a man who was holding on to his temper with both hands.

"My room ...?" Rubbing his eyes, Jayne tried to do a bit more focusing on the room around him, which now that he thought about it was starting to look suspiciously not like his. In fact, the place it really looked like was ...

_Oh shit._

Very carefully, Jayne lifted up the sheet and reached a hand downward. Yes, he was very definitely naked. And, from the feel of things, hadn't been wasting the opportunity.

_Oh double shit._

Hoping that he was going to wake up screaming any second now, Jayne very, very slowly turned his head to the other side of the bed, not at all surprised at the mass of tangled brown hair he found there. The mass of crazy, barely nineteen-year-old tangled brown hair.

_There aren't the words._

With the air of a dead man, he turned back to Book. "I don't suppose you'd believe me if I say I have no idea how the hell I got here, would ya."

"Probably not."

"Any chance of a head start?"

"About nineteen seconds, I would say."

He'd seen the shepherd move way too fast for a 19 second head start to be all that comforting. Tugging a sheet from the bed, Jayne wrapped it around his waist and moved towards the door, talking quickly to gain time. "I swear to you, Book, I never touched her." He stopped in the doorway, nearly tripping on the edge of the sheet and fighting to keep covered and moving. "I don't remember laying a hand on her. I didn't do it. I swear I didn't do it." He paused. "Did I?"

"Hmm, yes, Quite well in fact."

_Oh fuck._ He knew that voice and recognized the tone in it. Jayne turned towards her, feeling fear in every inch of his body. His every muscle flinched at the sight of her. The smile on her face screamed sexual satisfaction. _Oh double fuck._ River leaned up on her elbows and Jayne saw his death in her kiss-swollen lips and the stubble burn on her throat. _I'm dead. Room, locks, guns, now._Hiking up the sheet, Jayne turned and ran for the questionable safety of his quarters.

There wasn't anywhere safe enough on this ship.

000

_Hmm._River stretched her pleasantly aching muscles, enjoying the evidence of her successful experiment. Raising up on her elbows, she watched Jayne's nail-marked back disappear out the door. Book turned quickly as if to follow, then stopped. The Shepherd turned back and knelt at the side of her bed.

The concern on his face was touching, if unneeded. Book touched one hand to her cheek. "River, are you all right? Are you hurt?"

Slipping Jayne's shirt over her head, River smiled softly and patted his hair. "Don't look so scared, preacher man. I have to go save Jayne before they hurt him too badly." Another smile and River padded out the door on bare feet, leaving a thoroughly confused Book to watch her go.

000

"Jayne?" Kaylee stopped short at the sight of Jayne clutching a sheet around his hips and running like reavers were chasing him. And it looked like he was running from ...River's room. As she moved brokenly towards the door, her suspicions were confirmed. River trailed down the hall after Jayne, wearing only what looked like his shirt.

Face wiped blank by shock, Kaylee met Book's equally shocked expression. "Was...was that what I thought it was, Book?"

"Yes, Kaylee. On both counts." His arms crossed over his chest.

"Oh." A pause. "Does that mean what I hope it doesn't mean?"

"I'm afraid so, Kaylee."

"Damn." Kaylee started down the hall, then froze as the full scope of the situation hit her. With a vague shudder, she decided what must be done. "Book, you follow her and keep her away from Jayne. I'm gonna go get Simon 'fore he gets into trouble and call the Cap'n." Turning back the way she'd come, she grumbled under her breath, "Not that he's gonna be any calmer ..."

A few feet away, Kaylee pulled her comm out of her pocket. "Um, Cap'n ... we got ourselves a situation."

"I don't like that tone, Kaylee. What's wrong with my ship and how fast can you fix it?"

"It's not the ship, it's the crew ..." Kaylee trailed off, suddenly at a loss as how to explain the last five minutes.

"Kaylee, make sense. That's an order."

She took a deep breath. "Well, Captain, Simon's gonna try and kill Jayne and odds are you should probably go help him."

"Kill Jayne? You're disobeying orders, girl."

"No ..." Oblivious to Mal's comment, Kaylee went over the scene again in her head. "Better stop Simon for now, see what's goin' on. Then maybe you can kill him."

"Simon?"

"Of course not!" Kaylee's eyes widened in alarm. "I ain't lettin' ya hurt the Doc, no matter how crazy he gets. I was talkin' about Jayne."

There was a sigh. "Kaylee, I can't shake answers out of you over the comm. I repeat, explain the problem. Now."

"Um, well. Book and me, we saw Jayne running out a' River's room wearin' nothin' but a sheet and movin' like his tail was on fire, and then River came out after him wearin' nothin' but his shirt and lookin' like she'd just had on less." The words came out all squished together, like they tasted bad on the tongue and had to be spit out. "And when I tell Simon he's gonna kill Jayne." Honesty forced her to re-evaluate. "Or die trying ..."

"Not if I get to Jayne first, he won't." Kaylee heard what she thought was a gun being cocked before the connection cut off.

Damn. Sometimes she wondered if she was the only sensible one around here.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: See it just kept growing. In this chapter, we get a little more info on exactly what's going on. Mentions of potential violence and River getting a little too logical in a rather untraditional way. Technically there's nudity, but it's pretty enough no one minds.

**Chapter two**

"Simon, wake up …."

Slowly, Kaylee ran a finger down his well-defined chest, trying desperately to figure out how she was going to say this without giving the man she loved a heart attack. Really, it would be best if she could do it naked – one of his favorite distractions, Simon always said – but if she did there was a good chance *she'd* get distracted and the bad news would be forgotten entirely. At least, until Jayne felt the need to run by in a sheet again ….

Sighing, she leaned her lips closer to his ear. "Doc, wake up. I gotta talk to you. There's some … news."

"News?" Simon cocked one eye open. "As in 'we get to stay in bed all day' kind of news, or 'Serenity's going to blow up in 30 seconds and the Captain's blaming me' kind of news?"

"Um …" She leaned down and captured his mouth for a long, slow, lingering kiss, tongues tangling as his lean, strong fingers slid upward through her hair. Her hands went to either side of him on the bed, bracing her as she lost herself in the taste. Be careful in the way you try and buy yourself time ….

Suddenly, her comm crackled to life again. "Kaylee," Mal clipped out, anger making his voice clear even through the heavy cloth. "Tell your man I've got heavier weaponry if he wants it. His aim's bettered enough that he might actually manage to hit someone proper with it."

Simon raised an eyebrow as he raised up to a sitting position. "And why exactly does the Captain think I'm going to be needing heavy weaponry?"

"Because you guys always get all riled up about this sort of thing." Taking a deep breath, Kaylee sat back as well. "You've gotta think about the bigger picture here. Growth experiences and the like."

"Growth experiences? Have you been reading those child-rearing data disks again?"

She gently shoved him, both hands firmly against his chest. "And what's so bad about that? Stuff about growing up is the kind of thing lots of people should know about. Like … River, say."

Simon groaned, a hand over his eyes. "Don't tell me she's tried to start cloning again. Really, sometimes I actually manage to feel sympathy for my parents …"

"No, no, it ain't cloning. I think Mal managed to talk her outta that one." She paused, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear. "But maybe that experiment thing is the right way to be thinkin' about this."

His eyes widened. "You mean there's something worse than cloning? She hasn't blown anything up, has she?"

"No, nothin's blown up – Mal wouldn't be offerin' you the trigger end of a weapon if that'd happened. It's more of a … life experiment, ya know?" Carefully, she laid a hand on his shoulder. "She is all grown up …."

As it did with all caretakers, the phrase "she's all grown up" set off any number of red flag warnings in Simon's head. Nothing good *ever* came of teenagers thinking they were adults, especially if someone else was trying to break it to you gently … His eyes narrowed. "What. Happened."

"Well …" Kaylee shifted slightly, ready to at least try and block him. "Remember that 'break her heart and you'll wish I just broke your neck' speech Mal gave ya just after you and I got together f'r real?"

"Yes …"

"Well …" She took a deep breath. "You might haveta be givin' someone else that speech right soon."

At that exact moment, an entire series of boots ran past Kaylee's doorway. It was the wrong angle to see anything, but by this point the voices were just as distinctive (especially with this crew). Together they called roll in their heads, almost despite themselves – Book started out, and that would be Mal cutting him off. Inara was next, no doubt telling Mal not to snap at Book, and Wash was the _only_ person who sniggered like that. Zoe was last, kindly telling Wash to shut up and making sure the wrong people didn't get themselves killed.

There were only two people missing ….

At his change in expression (she desperately hoped he wouldn't burst something) she moved, jumping on top of his tensed-to-leap body before he could go anywhere. After a second he stopped struggling (even rage had its priorities) and just glared at her. "Get. Off. Me."

"When you've calmed down some, Doc," she replied evenly, hands on both his wrists. "If you're gonna go try and get yourself killed, you're gonna at least have the sense to do it with some boxer shorts on."

There was a moment of silence, then he let a breath hiss out through clenched teeth. "You have a point."

000

"As much as I hate to say this, sir, I don't think we can kill him yet."

In response, Mal just cocked his gun and pointed it at Jayne's doorway. "I can kill whoever I want to, Zoe. That's part of the fun of being captain."

"Sorry, Captain, but as blood relation I get first dibs on the bastard," Simon growled as he stalked towards them, wearing just his pants and brandishing what looked distinctly like a bonesaw. Kaylee, still looking fairy nervous, was only a second behind him. "If you'd like, though, I can save you some of the larger pieces …."

It was at that point that he bumped into Zoe's arm, which she'd held up to block him as soon as she'd heard him coming. "Sorry, Doctor, but answers before dismemberment." She paused. "At least on the scale you're planning."

At the expression on Simon's face, Wash reached out and patted him on the shoulder. "Don't worry, Simon. She does that to me _all_ the time."

"Zoe's right, you two." Inara laid a hand on the barrel of Mal's gun, pushing it down. "I know this looks … incriminating, but we owe it to everyone to find out what happened."

"I have a pretty good idea of what happened," Book muttered under his breath, old combat skills itching to be put to use. Then he sighed. "But Inara's right. Words are the way to solve problems, not violence."

"Oh, I find violence is generally pretty effective," Mal replied, trying to pull his gun back up.

"I think we should listen to Inara and not kill me till we know what's goin' on." Though Jayne's voice was muffled by the drop and several inches of metal standing between him and everyone else, the desperation in his voice was clear.

"No one asked you what your feelings were on the matter, Jayne. It's my ship and you'd best remember that."

"Well, you should ask me. I swear to you, Mal, I ain't never touched the girl."

Since Inara continued to stand between him and the door, her best proper lady glare firmly in position, Mal resigned himself to checking the bullets in his gun. "And how many times since we met you lied to me, Jayne Cobb? Why shouldn't I test how many shots that there door of yours can take 'fore it opens?"

The desperation was taking on a definite edge of panic. "Cause I didn't do it, Mal! I swear on …"

"I hate to interrupt your macho idiocy, Captain." Inara's voice was both low and sharp. "But can you explain to me how inflicting more pointless damage on this poor ship is at all a _good_ plan?"

Mal's glare was his only response. "Better make it good, Jayne. I'm not gettin' any more patient out here."

"I swear on all the money I'll ever grab in my life that I don't remember layin' one finger on River."

Zoe tilted her head and cocked an eyebrow. "I might have to believe him, sir. Jayne does love his money."

Book's conscience prompted him to contribute. "He did indeed seem genuinely shocked at where he had found himself this morning. He may very well be telling the truth."

"Does it matter if he remembers it?" Simon hissed as Kaylee tried to keep him calm. "So he was drunk and doesn't remember touching my sister. He still did it." Kaylee's hands were warm against his chest as she held him back with only her body in front of his.

"I wasn't drunk. I only had one … shit."

Outside the door, Wash got a wry smile on his face at the rhythmic thunk of Jayne's head against metal, the muffled sound of cursing. He crouched down and, making a 'pardon me' gesture at Inara, pressed his ear against the door. "From the sound of things I think he remembers it now. Bonesaw, anyone?"

"Happy to oblige."

"Simon, no." Kaylee stopped his lunge forward by wrapping both arms around his waist and resting her cheek against his. "I ain't lettin' ya go."

His voice softened as he rested his free hand on her hip. "Kaylee, love, please move."

"It's for your own good, Doc." The rhythmic thunks continued. "No matter how mad ya are now, you'd feel all guilted up later. If somethin' needs ta be done, let the Captain do it." She smiled and snuggled closer into his arms. "Besides, I like it here."

000

The rhythmic pounding of Jayne's forehead against the metal ladder and the resulting pain in his skull did nothing to stop the visual.

River, doing that crazy, floaty, barefoot walk across the room towards him. That little smile of hers as she handed him a cup, like the whole 'verse was a joke normal folk couldn't get. "Have a drink, Jayne. You've had a hard day." The distracted tone to her voice, like she hadn't been plotting at his manhood.

"I should've known better. The little witch." Jayne released the ladder and sank to the floor, forehead in his hands as the next visual took hold. Strange little thing, just like she was, with the effect of both twisting and warming his innards. Soft skin under his hands as River climbed across his lap and pulled his lips to hers. She was naked, so was he, and his whole body was responding fully without any control from his brain. River felt so good, but she was gonna get him killed.

"She drugged me! The little witch drugged me, Mal." His voice changed into a high falsetto for a bad River impression. 'Have a drink, Jayne. Don't mind me while I take yer pants off, Jayne.' I didn't do it to her, she did it to me! Don't kill me for somethin' I weren't in control of."

Silence filled the space beyond his door and Jayne lifted his head, the smallest sign of hope written across his face. Then reality crashed down with the patter of bare feet on metal.

"No, Simon, don't hurt him. I'm not done with him yet."

_Shit, I'm dead._

000

"Everyone! Silence!"

They had called it the 'command voice' back at the Academy, designed to be used as the first line of defense against the improper behavior of clients and later in the training of other companions. Since she had joined the crew of Serenity, however, Inara had found a _much_ wider range of uses for it.

And, more often than not, it proved surprisingly effective – the uproar that had started at River's rather … dramatic opening line had quieted remarkably (though Simon's silence was, admittedly, due much more to Kaylee's influence than her own). Seizing the offered opportunity, Inara quickly held a hand up to forestall commentary (for the moment, at least – not even a companion's powers could hold this group for long), met Mal's glare with one to match it and then turned to River. "River," she said very slowly, backed by the encouraging expression on Kaylee's face. "I believe the rest of us would like an explanation."

"I've only completed phase one of the experimentation process," River said simply, the edge of Jayne's shirt skimming her thighs as she bent to check for weaknesses in Jayne's door. "And if this little mouse is damaged, it will be remarkably difficult to find an equally suitable test subject."

The background erupted into a mixture of groans and surprised exclamations (and a muffled protest from Jayne at the use of the word 'little') as even Inara fought to keep her eyes from widening. "Test subject?"

"Of course," River responded, moving upward to check for seams in the metal that could be exploited. "I've completed what research was available to me on the act of copulation and sexual responsiveness in the recently post-adolescent female. The animal studies lacked true applicability, and though the files acquired from both your shuttle and Simon's medlab were much more relevant," ("Breathe, Doc, breathe. Stay with me, lover,") "all of the data seemed truly conclusive about only one aspect – true understanding about the sexual act could be configured only through personal experimentation. So I decided to begin."

Zoe raised an eyebrow. "With Jayne?"

"Of course." River glanced back at Zoe, blowing a lock of hair out of her eye. "He was by far the best test subject."

A self-satisfied noise wafted up from the other side of the doorway. "She does have a point there …." The only response was another Kaylee-aborted lunge from Simon.

River looked back at Jayne's room with a mildly vexed expression. "Not the most appealing of test subjects, no, but without all the negative potentialities of the rest of you." Her eyes moved over the rest of the crowd. "After careful evaluation of several factors, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to experiment with a male of the species, which immediately eliminates 50 percent of my possible candidates. Simon is my brother, and both the physical and emotional proximity of our relationship makes him completely unviable. Wash is signed to another, which would also taint the experiment with uncontrolled emotional variables as well as the threat of early termination from Zoe. Shepherd's vows offered to his higher symbol are an unnecessary complication as well, along with other variables. As for Mal …."

River met Inara's gaze, held it until the companion was forced to look away. Being far too fond of their skins, everyone avoided seeing what Mal's expression was. "As for Mal, the difficulties are so numerous as to be incalculable."

Very, very slowly, Simon sank his head into Kaylee's shoulder. "I thought she was _better_," he muttered.

"Oh, I don't think Jayne's gotten to the performance critique yet," Wash commented, then accepted Zoe's slap on the arm good-naturedly.

There was a moment of silence then, as everyone tried to figure out something to say that wouldn't involve an immediate and dramatic explosion. Then the door to Jayne's room suddenly swung open to reveal an extremely disturbed Jayne. "Wait a minute, you're doin' experiments on me? Why you …"

His voice trailed off as he saw the various forms of weaponry that were suddenly pointed at him. Sure, the situation had proved considerably more complicated than previously suspected and his level of fault in the matter had been seriously put into question, but no one in their right mind would pass up the chance to shoot Jayne.

The door quickly swung shut.

"But a crazy girl doin' tests on me? That just ain't right, Captain. I ain't gonna stand for it."

"It seems like you were standing pretty well last night," Wash added. Zoe, as expected, slapped him again, but he was gratified to see the corner of her mouth quirk upward as she did so. "See," he murmured. "I knew there was a reason you married me."

"Being part of the rational quest for knowledge is a more than sensible way to expend one's energies." River said calmly, pitching her voice so that it could be heard with perfect clarity through the door. "Besides, all evidence showed that you highly enjoyed your participation last night."

"Enjoy … I … well …" There was an extremely pregnant pause, during which anybody with a decent imagination could almost see the visual that was springing into Jayne's little mind. Those perfect little white hands moving down, down, encircling him with a tight, firm grip as fingers rubbed and touched and stroked and snapped him quite definitely to attention, whether he wanted to or not. Not that, after the first few seconds, at least, he'd really minded …. "Still, Captain, sex ain't science. Ya gotta do somethin' about this."

"Oh, I reckon I'm gonna do something." Swinging his gun downward, Mal turned to face River. "As long as you can keep from damaging my ship or the rest of my crew, you have my full permission to experiment with Jayne as long as your crazy little heart desires. And you," he added as he moved around to face Simon, gun in suddenly a much more active position. "Are just gonna learn to live with that. We all gotta deal with people movin' on." Then Mal stalked down the corridor, leaving everyone else staring after him in shocked silence.

"Damn," Wash said quietly after he was certain the Captain was out of earshot. "I've really gotta start stealing his exit lines."

000


	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** Yes, it was a bit of an untraditional beginning for our River and Jayne, but their relationship gets a little more normal from here on out. This Chapter is M for consensual sex.

**Hard on the Knees**

By Gatekeeper and AnitaB

Chapter three

A smile crossed her lips as River slipped noiselessly out of bed. Jayne might need a little ... convincing as well. She shivered, remembering the heat of his hands on her skin. Based on his previous responses, it shouldn't be too hard to get his willing participation despite his vocal objections to the mixing of science and sex. Besides the itch in her skin and the ache of her body said that the results would be well worth the price of convincing Jayne.

Pressing both palms to the door, River tilted her head, listening carefully. Nothing, she couldn't hear him, either awake or asleep, breathing outside her room. Slipping outside, she crept silently on bare feet to Jayne's door. Those seams in the metal proved useless: they wouldn't give an inch. The latch, maybe. The small hope shattered and River sighed. "The hard way, then." Kneeling before the metal barrier, River closer her eyes and ran her fingertips over the lock. Blindly pulling a slender piece of metal from a pocket of her skirt, she effortlessly wiggled each tumbler aside and slowly pushed the door open.

Darkness and quiet snoring. Perfect, the element of surprise had not yet been lost. Closing the door after memorizing the small room's layout, River left a scattered trail of clothes to his bedside, peering at him through the dark. Despite what she'd said to the others earlier, he was quite a male specimen. Broad shoulders, strong arms, lean body, impressive... Well it wasn't like she's seen many of them, but according to all the diagrams, Jayne's was certainly adequate at least. And the memory of way he had made her feel by using it was nothing short of ... fascinating. And definitely something River wanted to try again.

Moving closer, she leaned over him and breathed in the scent of his skin. There was something intensely stimulating about the smell of male sweat. Another part of sex she was eager to explore. Not to mention taste... resting a hand on the edge of his bunk, River moved to climb onto the bed when Jayne moved sharply.

"What the..."

River gasped at the force of his grip around her wrist. Strength, physical force was also very stimulating, especially when she remembered how she had made him weak with her touch.

"River?" Jayne sat up without releasing her arm and turned to flip on a light. "River, why are you... oh, no." His eyes flicked down her body and she smiled proudly at the way his adam's apple bobbed at the sight of her. "No, not again, little witch. I ain' nobody's lab rat. Not even yours." Pushing River back, Jayne slowly stood up, focusing his eyes determinedly above her neck. "So put your clothes back on and leave."

The smile on her lips simply widened as River visually counted the pulse in his neck. His lips might say no but his body was responding nicely. "Is that what you really want, Jayne?" She stepped closer reaching out a hand to trace a scar on his chest with a single fingertip, pleased when his hands clenched.

000

Jayne felt the fabric beneath him pull and moved instantly from deep dream to complete awareness, finding a very small wrist inside his fist, a tiny feminine and familiar wrist– River's arm in his grip. Goddamn it. "River?" Sitting up, reaching for the light, he held onto the arm and kept himself out of her reach. "River, why are you ..." His breath stopped as his brain kicked into shock and his throat swallowed involuntarily. Jayne felt his eyes move entirely without his control and travel over the naked woman in front of him. God, she was hot. "Oh, no. No, not again, little witch. I ain' nobody's lab rat." He fought back the heated memory of her kiss. "Not even yours." Rallying his self-control and his sense of self-preservation, Jayne pushed her away and stood up. "So put your clothes back on and leave." Feeling his heart speed up in a combination of arousal and fear, he flinched as she smiled. Jayne knew that smile, it was the one River had been wearing as she'd moved to kneel across his hips.

"Is that what you really want, Jayne?" She brushed the tip of one of her fingers over the old knife wound along his ribs. A blaze of heat followed that tiny bit of skin against his and Jayne fisted his hands to not reach out for more of that heat against his palms. "Because, last night you seemed more than willing for me to take my clothes off." She moved closer and the skin on his chest ached with the need to feel her heat wrapped around him. "In fact, I still haven't found the buttons you tore off my skirt." River trailed the edges of her nails down his stomach towards...

And Jayne felt the blood in his body start to follow her touch. He groaned low in his throat and leaned into her warmth against his will. Jayne couldn't help but remember the unbearable pleasure of her hand around his length and the wet caress of her tongue over his stomach. And there she was offering him that same...

"No, River." He grabbed her wrist and stepped back. "Science ain't sex, girl. And I ain't your lab rat." The breath halted in his throat and his heart pounded.

"Poor Jayne. I had hoped to try you unaided, but it you're afraid you won't..." River paused, a comforting expression half on her face. "Measure up to last night... a confirmation of phase one wouldn't hurt my data. I can get you some of the Bremelanotide I put in your drink." She turned, obviously about to leave for the enhancer when something inside Jayne seemed to sort of snap.

"I'm afraid I won't measure up?" Catching her by one arm, Jayne spun River around and jerked her close. "You sayin' I ain't up for this?" He flattened a hand against the small of her back, pulling her flush against his body so she could feel him pressing hard into her stomach. "I'll show you how much I measure up." Jayne had time enough to register the bright smile on her face before his lips crashed into hers. /Damn, can she kiss./

He found one hand fisting itself in her hair as the other hauled her closer. Deepening the kiss, Jayne savored the taste he remembered so well, bending her over his arm to better feel her firm breasts and soft skin against his chest. "River,"

Her hands hit his chest as her body heat withdrew. A quiet smile and a soft head-shaking forced his grip to open as River moved to kneel in the center of his bunk. "Take everything off and come here."

She was naked, beautiful, smiling and calling to him a curving of her tiny finger. And Jayne knew for damn sure he'd regret this later, but a naked, willing woman was a naked, willing woman. And he *was* Jayne. His fingers closed over the last cloth on his body as he moved towards the bed.

000

She had him and she knew it. The hands in her hair and on her back arched her backwards as Jayne ravaged her mouth with his. But now that River had him, what did she want to do with him. Or have him do to her. Breaking the kiss, she pushed on Jayne's chest, sliding out of his arms to kneel in the middle of his bed. Something inside her glowed at the way his eyes wandered over her and his hands clenched. River curled a finger at him, smiling an invitation. "Take everything off and come here."

River watched eagerly as those fingers, so swift with a gun, hurriedly unfastened the button and zipper, dropping the worn fabric to the metal floor. Jayne certainly was an attractive picture as he crawled the length of the bed towards her. A nice specimen – broad shoulders, muscled chest, strong arms, and more than adequate... stamina and skill. And he was getting closer by the instant. By the look on Jayne's face, he knew exactly what he was going to do to her. And while River remembered just how much fun those plans of his could be, she had a few plans of her own, and a lot of ideas.

When his lips were mere inches from hers, River pulled back sharply, holding a finger against his mouth. "Wait,"

"Don't you start playin' games with me, girl. You said you wanted this, River. Make up your mind." His muscles tensed as he waited and River was touched. For all his faults, he was harmless in some ways. If she changed her mind, he would let her go... remarkable, really.

River leaned forward, exploring his face with ten fingertips. "I'm not playing games, Jayne. Let me show you what I want." Bracing both hands on his broad shoulders, she pushed him back to sit on his heels in front of her. Moving close, River almost straddled his lap, feeling his hands clench on her hips and try to pull her closer. "Now, kiss me." As Jayne leaned in towards her lips, she turned her head and raised a hand to the line of her throat. "Here."

Jayne hesitated and River waited, wondering just how well he would take orders. Her breath left her throat in a shuddering gasp as his lips closed over the beating pulse under her skin. He rubbed hot palms along her thighs, pulling River across his lap and against his body. Ravaging her throat as requested, Jayne employed lips, teeth, tongue, and beard stubble over the sensitive stretch of skin, listening and adjusting to the sounds of her moans.

/Definitely a more than adequate test subject./ River groaned, wrapping her arms around his neck and her fingers into his hair. The arch of her back led his mouth up to her ear as his hands burned up her back to fist in her hair. "River?"

/Oh, yeah, giving orders./ Tightening her legs around his waist, River arched against him, guiding his head down. "Here, Jayne," She gasped as he smiled against her skin and planted both hands in the center of her back.

"Whatever you say, baby."

River felt fire ricochet through her blood when his lips closed around one stiffened peak and pulled. This reaction made no sense. Breasts existed for the practical purpose of reproductive nutrition. A man's mouth there shouldn't feel ... so damn good. "Jayne, more, please."

"So sweet, River," Sliding his hands to her hips, Jayne lifted her harder into his mouth, feeding hungrily at her flesh. It was amazing what this man could do to her body. His arms tightened and River remembered his hands. Mustn't let those sit by idly. Tipping her head down, she got lost momentarily in the expression of ... wonder on his face. River had wanted to explore her own sexual responses, but that look on his face opened a whole new line of unanswered questions.

"You feel so good, girl." One of his hands slid up to tenderly cup one breast and he groaned against her skin. "River,"

"Jayne, touch me."

"Where, River? Here?" Jayne stroked a hand down her side to trail his fingertips between her thighs, watching her melt at his touch.

"Oh, yes," River dug her nails into his shoulders, feeling her head arch back and her body rock into his hand. "Yes, Jayne, there. Please." The hand that had become the center of her attention shifted, pressing two thick fingers inside her and forcing a groan from her.

"So how'm I measuring up, River?" Jayne pressed his forehead to hers, watching her eyes fall closed with each thrust of his hand. Her nails clenched in his skin before her hands moved up to run through his hair. "Imagine it, River, I could do this to you," The tip of his thumb circled her clit as his fingers plunged deeper. "With other parts of me. I can make you scream. Give me time and I can show you all there's to know about sex."

"Jayne, show me." River slid her hands down to feel the movement of the muscles of his back under his skin. "Make me scream, Jayne. Show me." His smile against her lips sent a shudder along her spine. River should insult his virility more often, she liked what it did to him.

"Come here, girl." Jayne gathered her close, moving up the bed to lay her back on the pillow. "I want you comfortable while I work." Pressing her hands down above her head, he leaned over her and admired the young, firm body laid out in his bed, his to explore, to play with. Touching one thumb to those soft lips, Jayne moved closer. "Open your mouth, River."

She did, gasping at the wet exploration of his tongue in her mouth, the warm press of his lips against her own. This shouldn't feel so good, mouths together like this. Just a kiss shouldn't send electricity through her blood like this, but it did. "Jayne,"

"Shh, baby, I ain't done yet." He slid along her body, planting kisses against the sensitive skin of her throat, the line of her waist. "You taste so good, River." Jayne wrapped his hands around her ribs, burying his face between her breasts and licking at her skin. Then those lips wrapped around one nipple to taste and tease.

"Jayne, how do I feel?" River stroked a hand over his hair, only to feel his head rise.

"Huh? What, River?" Bracing himself above her, Jayne met her eyes with confusion. "What craziness are you talking about, girl?"

"How do I feel?" River grabbed his hand, curving his fingers around her breast. "What do I feel like? Under your hands, lips. How do I taste? How do you feel me?"

"I think I got it," Smiling, Jayne ran his lips down her side to nibble at the edge of her hip, groaning low in his throat. "You feel so damn good, River." He stroked the tip of his tongue against her skin. "You feel so soft and smooth, like silk." Shifting, Jayne kissed along her stomach, dipping into her belly button to taste. "You taste so good, River." He lifted his head to look up at her. "Such sweet lips, but I bet you taste even better here." Sliding a hand between her legs, Jayne groaned. "So wet, so hot, so good."

River shuddered, her legs tightening helplessly around him. She didn't understand why his voice going low and rumbling like that should make her stomach muscles clench, but it did. Those muscles tightened even more at the brush of the rough pad of his finger over her clit. "Jayne,"

"Open for me, River."

His voice was still near a growl and River felt her body leap in response. Big hands flattened against the insides of her thighs, slowly pushing her knees apart as Jayne moved lower against her. Moaning softly, River felt beard stubble and wet lips trace along her skin as his hands closed around her ankles.

"Here," Those hands moved her until her feet were flat against the middle of his back and his face was mere inches from her heat. "Push up against me."

River barely processed the words before her body did as he ordered at the first stroke of his tongue between her legs, muscles tightening and feet pressing down as she arched up. "Jayne, yes, more." Her hands clenched against his hair as she fought the level of sensation to focus on exactly what he was doing to her.

"God, you taste good, River." His hands curved around her hips, helping her rock against his face as he pulled out every trick in the book to use on her sensitive flesh. Lips, teeth and tongue nibbled, stroked and plunged, forcing small breathless sounds from River.

"Jayne... uhh... yes," River's hands spasmed against the sheets as her body arched helplessly against him. Groaning, she clenched her fingers in his hair, using the position he'd arranged her in to rock her hips with the rhythm of his tongue inside her. Then Jayne shifted between her legs and two fingers pressed against something deep inside her. Something that felt unbelievably good. Something that made her body jerk and her nails dig into his shoulders. "Ja- Jayne!"

"That's my girl. You like that, don't you, River?" Watching the reactions on her face, Jayne touched that spot again just to feel her entire body move under his hands. Keeping that hand caressing her, he crawled up her body, dropping a kiss on each breast before smiling down into her eyes. "How'm I measuring up, baby? How does *this* feel?" Those fingers pressed and River felt every nerve in her body respond with a burst of electricity. "Do you want more, River? 'Cause I can give you more, everything your sweet little body can take."

His hands, his voice, his skin under her fingers– Yeah, River wanted anything and everything Jayne could give her. "Jayne, yes, show me more." Arms sliding around his neck, she dragged his lips to hers, eagerly savoring the taste of herself on his tongue as her body rocked unconsciously against his hand. Until it left. Breaking the kiss, River moaned at the loss, curling a leg around his hips to pull him closer. "Jayne, please,"

"I got you, baby. I got something you'll love." His hands stroked up her back to slide along her arms, tugging her up. "On your knees, girl." Shivering, she quickly complied, arranging herself into a position she'd studied before– on her hands and knees facing away. "Not quite," Jayne lightly rubbed calloused fingertips over the soft skin of the insides of her elbows, urging her down. "Lower, River." Kneeling between her ankles, he leaned over her back and kissed the side of her neck. "Trust me – it'll feel so good."

"Jayne, please." Bracing her forearms flat against the bed, River tried to move close to him, reveling in the feel of his heat but needing more contact with his skin. Jayne, though, had other ideas – his hands on her waist held her motionless. "Jayne." River fought to speak above a breathless moan. "I need you now. I want to feel you." Flipping her hair to the side, she watched him over her shoulder, admiring the way his muscles moved under the skin of his arms. "Jayne, now."

"Impatient girl." Jayne curved his hands around her hips, parting her legs to settle himself closer against her heat. "Is this what you wanna feel, River?" A languid motion of his hips sent her nails into the fabric of his sheets. Calloused fingers rubbed the lines of her back as Jayne leaned closer to trail kisses over her neck. The low rumble of his voice in her ear sent a shudder through her body. "Say you want me, River."

Her eyes fluttered shut as those rough fingertips squeezed and caressed her breasts. "Yes, Jayne, I want you." The feel of him so close but not nearly close enough had every inch of his body rocking urgently in his arms. "Jayne, now."

"See, baby, this is what I can do to you. Me, nothing in my drink, no drugs, just me. I can make every inch of your beautiful little body beg for me." River gasped as one of his hands slipped between her legs to stroke the wet heat he found there, groaning against her skin. "I can make you want me this much." A gentle thrust seated Jayne full length inside her and drove a harsh sound from two throats. "God, River, you feel so damn good."

This, this was amazing. River would have to study exactly what it was about the position that made his length inside her feel so good. Remembering the rough slide of his fingers over the bend of her arms she sank lower on her elbows, hearing Jayne groan at the shift.

"Yeah, baby, just like that." Sliding his hands along her body to grip her hips, Jayne kissed her shoulder and started to move inside her. It was then that River suddenly understood – this angle made him touch that electric spot inside her every thrust of his hips, sending shocks pulsing throughout her body.

"Jayne, more." River fisted both hands into the sheet, trying to arch back to feel more of him. Feeling those strong hands tighten against her thighs she followed their lead, rocking her hips against his in a circular motion. Closing her eyes, River found himself drowning in the sensations he caused, hearing the sounds each thrust of Jayne's hips pushed from her throat. "Jayne … yes."

"God, River, yes. That's it, girl, move with me." Jayne leaned forward, planting his hands flat on the bed on either side of her shoulders and kissing the pulse under her neck. With every move of his body, Jayne could feel the body under him move closer to the edge, to the pleasure he needed to drive her towards. "You feel so damn good, River. I'm gonna make you feel so good." Keeping his rhythm deep and steady, he slid both hands along her ribs to cradle her breasts in his palms, groaning against her skin. "So soft and warm. God, you're good, girl."

The caress of his fingertips against her nipples only heightened the jolts of pleasure already coursing through her body. Grabbing his wrists, River used the strength in his arms to thrust back harder, gasping at the way he felt pounding into that sensitive spot inside her. Every thrust of his body, every heated caress, every brush of skin sent the electric wave of pleasure swelling higher inside her. Lost in the sensations, River dug blunt nails into the skin of his arms, groaning and arching against him.

"Come on, River, scream my name. You know you want to." He flicked the tip of his tongue against her earlobe, moving to press a kiss on the nape of her neck. "Come for me, baby, come for me. I wanna feel it …." Jayne scraped the edge of his teeth along her skin just to hear her breathless gasp. God, she was so sensitive, responding so strongly to his every touch. "Sweet girl, River."

River felt the breath leave her body as two strong arms wrapped around her waist and lifted her effortlessly against his chest as Jayne sat back on his heels. She dug her nails into his wrists and groaned at the increasing strength of his thrusts, each one still touching the electric spot inside her. River could feel her nails breaking his skin as the pleasure swelled higher inside her. "Jayne, so close, please."

"Come on, baby, I wanna feel every inch of this beautiful body tighten for me." Trailing little bites over her neck, Jayne spread his knees, forcing hers wider open. His fingers dove between her legs, caressing the place where she was stretched around him, caressing the tiny nub that held her most responsive nerves. "Scream for me, River, scream my name."

That one touch, one last hard thrust and all her circuits overloaded. River shattered, screaming his name. The feel of his teeth sinking into her shoulder and his release inside her only added fuel to the fire, making her body arch so hard that his arms tightening reflexively around her were the only things keeping her knees on the bed. Mindless minutes later, River felt Jayne's hands guiding her down onto the bed before the rest of him collapsed next to her, still breathing hard.

"God, that was...unbelievable, River."

Settling closer against his side, she encouraged him to continue the languid stroke of his hand up and down her thigh. River couldn't help but agree, that had been...far better than she'd expected. She definitely needed to insult his ego more often in the future. To that end...

She pasted an unenthusiastic expression on her face. "Certainly adequate, Jayne." River patted in knee in a comforting gesture. "Good job."

"Good job? Adequate?" Jayne rolled closer, fisting a hand in her hair. "I just made you scream, girl. You clawed me up 'cause I made you feel so good." A rough hand gripped her waist and dragged her hard against the front of his body, forcing her knee over the side of his hip and up his side. "I'm the best you'll ever have." River had the time to let out a harsh groan before his lips covered her and his body pressed her down into the mattress.

Curling her arms around his neck, River opened to his kiss. *Damn, the male ego is useful.*

000


	4. Chapter 4

**Hard on the Knees**

By Gatekeeper and AnitaB

Chapter four

Weeks passed. Jayne, who started looking as though he no longer believed in sleep, took to stockpiling any and all vitamins he came across. The noises were probably the hardest to live with, though Book was very briefly popular for his ability to fashion makeshift earplugs. Kaylee did her best to stay *very* close to Simon. Everyone tried very hard not to visualize the details.

Eventually, Jayne started to pick up on the strategy behind River's particular form of … encouragement, but by then the charm of a woman wanting to have constant sex with him had managed to soak through and the manipulation was no longer needed. At least, as far as she told him.

Medical treatment, however, was another matter entirely ….

000

The knock at her shuttle door was quiet, almost hesitant, and Inara fought the urge to swear under her breath. She was barely fit company for herself, let alone for someone else, but none of the very few people on Serenity who would bother making such a sound deserved to bear the brunt of it. Book, maybe, with new worries over River's course of action. Or Kaylee, asking for new ways to tie Simon down that he might not mind so much.

Or Mal, with understanding finally in his eyes. But no, she was awake, wasn't she ….

Sighing, she shrugged on a convenient robe. Perhaps the distraction would prove to be a blessing. "Come in."

"You decent? I ain't lookin, I swear it."

Inara's head jerked upward at the sound of the voice. He, admittedly, had been at the bottom of her list. At the bottom of most lists, actually ... "Jayne!"

As the door slid open Jayne hurriedly threw up empty hands and put on the closest thing to an innocent expression he was capable of. It was terrible, true, but there was always hope she would give him points for effort. "It's okay, it's okay. I'm bein' good, really ..." A particularly detailed thought hit him, making him wince. "Okay, so I'm bein' good *now.* But you see how long you hold up, a naked little minx throwin' herself at you ..."

Still struggling for a grip on the situation, Inara held up a hurried hand of her own. "You have no idea how much I don't want you to continue."

Jayne sighed. "Yeah, that's what I figured. But you was one of the few people who weren't callin' for my family jewels on a stick the first time she pulled something like this, and even a city guy like Doc can be scary when he's got a cuttin' tool pointed at your bits." He rubbed a hand over his face, disgusted with the entire situation. "So ... I ... uh ..."

Inara raised an eyebrow. "Nouns and verbs are usually rather helpful in these sorts of situations, Jayne."

"I ... er ... I ..."

"Yes ...?"

He winced, looking more embarrassed than she would have thought him capable. "I need your help."

"Ah." Not the answer the situation required, surely, but much better than her first instinct to scream and run. Still, backing up a step never hurt anything. "With … what exactly?" Given Jayne's current problem and the unpleasantly … predictable way his mind worked, the variety of answers he could give made her mind twitch unpleasantly.

"With …. Aw damn, *nothin'* like that." Jayne's eyes widened as he realized just how Inara had taken the question, and exactly what that might imply about his generally well-touted capabilities. "I can take care ah *that* just fine on my own. *Just* fine. Go ask River if you don't believe me. We …."

Inara's hand came up again in self-defense. It was a dangerous thing sometimes, trying to have a conversation with Jayne. "Once again, something I could happily live my entire life not knowing."

He scowled briefly. "Ain't even gonna let a man defend himself …."

"Help, Jayne. You said you needed my help?"

"Yeah." Relenting, Jayne turned around and started peeling off his shirt, revealing a series of long red claw marks that decorated his back. "Ya got a med kit in here, don'cha?"

"Yes. I had it replenished during the last supply run." Inara blinked, startled despite herself at the sight of the injuries. "River did this to you?" Worse, she was feeling a distinct twinge of sympathy for the man welling up somewhere in her, along with the frightening thought that there wasn't anything she could do to stop it …

"Yeah." There was a distinct touch of manly pride in his voice. "Get a new set of 'em 'bout every night. She got a little too excited, if you know what I mean."

Ah, that did it. "Quite." Twinge sufficiently crushed, she went to retrieve the supplies. "I take it you want these bandaged up?"

"Yeah." Sensing she wasn't appreciating the view, Jayne let the shirt fall back into place for the moment. "Can't exactly reach back there myself."

Unable to help herself, she lifted an eyebrow. "Are you sure you don't want to keep them visible? As souvenirs, perhaps?"

"Believe me, I wanted to." As always, Jayne was blissfully unaware of the sarcasm in her voice. "But it was makin' it damn hard to sleep, and I need ta be well rested for all them other testin' sessions River's plannin'" There was more anticipation there than annoyance, but Inara decided not to mention this to him. "Sides, like I said, the Doc's on the warpath. And I don't wanna be wavin' no red flag at him." He paused. "Even if I could take 'em. Which I could, you know. Easy."

The corner of Inara's mouth turned up wryly. "But you should be saving your strength."

Jayne relaxed. "Knew you'd understand the situation."

000

A half hour later, though, she was feeling rather less tolerant. "Jayne," she said firmly as she once more attempted to affix the tape, "if you do not stop squirming this *instant* I am kicking you off my shuttle and leaving you to fend for yourself. I promise you, none of my draperies are armed."

Jayne, shooting another rather nervous-looking glance at the doorway, remained unmollified. "Ain't yer fancy stuff I'm worried about. It's all them noises I keep hearin'."

"Noises?" Inara stopped, perplexed. "We're on a *ship,* Jayne, and an old one at that – if it ever *stopped* making noise I'd worry that we'd become stranded again. If you had to develop a phobia, that was certainly not one of the wiser ones for your current profession."

Jayne shook his head. "Ain't scared a no gorram ship. Her Captain's the one that'll shove me out a hatch if he catches me in here."

"He's the one that gave her the permission to continue her experiment in the first place." Inara forced her voice to move passed the sudden chill that gripped her. "Given the results and Simon's feelings on the matter, it's only natural you should seek medical attention here."

Fear momentarily forgotten, Jayne snorted. When the hell had he become the smart one? "Mal ain't gonna see nothin' that puts me alone with you as all that natural."

The freeze filled the room. "*Oh*? Why is that?"

Suddenly, Jayne had the horrible realization that he was in trouble. Brains, as it turned out, weren't much good when you were sliding the hell off a cliff. "Um … er …"

"Yes?"

Jayne inched away slowly, mumbling something.

Inara stepped closer, making Jayne wince. The ice had developed into a point, and right now it was aimed at his head. "You were saying?"

"Well …" Mal couldn't mind her knowing, could he? It wasn't as if he was trying to *hide* it …. "He's kinda protective of what's his?"

There was a long, sharp moment of silence, then a voice cut in from the doorway. "Been thinkin' too hard again, Jayne?"

It was not a pleased voice. More importantly, it was a voice that Jayne knew could do very bad things to him. He turned around very, very slowly. "He … hey, Mal."

"Hey, Jayne." The words were like a lead weight, but somehow still far less dangerous than Mal's expression. "Mind tellin' me what you're doin' in here?"

Inara suddenly stepped between them, glaring at Mal. "That, Captain Reynolds, is none of your concern." Her lips twisted as his eyes widened slightly. "Yes, remember me? Now let's pretend I'm actually an adult, more than capable of making my *own* decisions."

Mal's glare slid over easily, as if she was where it had wanted to be all along. "Fine job you've done of that particular task. By the way, how's the whoring business been lately?"

She very carefully looked him up and down, her expression packed with every ounce of derision she was capable of. "Better than yours, smuggler. Or should I not call you that, since you can't actually get your hands on anything worth smuggling?"

Jayne, very sensibly, was cowering in the corner by this point. Sure, as soon as they'd locked eyes the pair had fallen into their usual habit of pretty much forgetting there was anyone else on the ship, but heaven help anyone who was in grabbing range should one of them start to remember.

Turned out he'd been smarter than he'd realized to avoid this whole romance business. Love, it seemed, made people *scary.*

Anger blazed through Mal's voice. "You don't like the accommodations, princess, then leave. There ain't nothin' keepin' you here among us simple folk."

"There isn't, is there?" Inara's eyes flashed dark and full of pain as she turned away. "You've made that *abundantly* clear."

The hurt on her face was a living thing, and for the moment it deflated Mal faster than anything else could have. He very nearly reached for her retreating back, only to have his hand flinch away at the last minute. "Dammit, Inara," he sighed, running a frustrated hand through his hair. "They're your people. Your *family.* I ain't got the right."

"And when exactly has that ever stopped you?" Inara's voice had an edge to it she couldn't quite get rid of – someone who didn't know her better might say it was close to cracking.

Mal closed his eyes, shook his head. He didn't have an answer to that one.

She faced him then. Almost, she thought of reaching out to him. "Family means a lot of different things, Mal," she said softly. "It wasn't until I got here that I realized just how many. And I can't … I can't fit into their definition anymore. I can't go back there."

Dammit. He of all people should be more understanding about this. But there was so much else here to consider …. "Is it really so bad, what they're asking?" The question had a definite plaintive edge to it, right there for anyone to mention.

As long, of course, as they didn't know him better.

Inara's nails dug into her palms, helping her hold on to her control. The thousandth and first time this question had come up, she was sure. How many more would she have to endure? "How would you feel if someone asked you to give up Serenity? To stop flying?"

His eyes widened with shock, cut deep with a pain she had no idea how she'd inflicted. "Dammit, Inara, whoring can't mean that much to you!"

Mistake. You could almost see the shutters slam down over Inara's expression, if you weren't distracted by a very sensible fear for your life. Jayne, though he would have never admitted it, considered whimpering.

Finally, she looked Mal in the eye. "Why not," she said slowly, her voice empty. "It's all I have."

Then, still so stiff, so cold, she turned to her console. "My brother has contacted me recently, wishing to purchase passage on Serenity for himself and an old family friend. Not the representative my parents would have chosen, I'm sure, but the only one with a serious possibility of persuading me to return with him. I told him I would consider it."

A pause. "I believe, though, that it's become painfully clear what the answer should be."

Guilt, anger and a thousand other emotions left Mal frozen. It was no longer possible to tell who was doing the cutting and who was doing the dying. There was just the blood, covering everything. Impossible to wash away.

His voice was rough. "Only sensible one to make."

She raised a cool, untouchable eyebrow. "You could certainly use the money."

He narrowed his eyes at her. There were a dozen responses he wanted to make, even now, but they'd all give more away than he was able. So he opted for the easy one. "It's my ship. I'll make the arrangements."

"And as long as I'm still paying rent, this ship is *mine.* Get off it. Now."

Not knowing what else to do, Mal left. A few minutes later, the coast was clear enough that Jayne crept out from under Inara's bed and followed him.

He'd never liked listening to someone cry.

000


	5. Chapter 5

**Hard on the Knees**

**By Gatekeeper and AnitaB**

**Chapter five**

Jayne, shirt still in one hand, crept silently into his own bunk. Closing the door behind him, he glanced at the form outlined by his sheets. River. Sleeping in his bed, she was covered from toe to neck by his blankets, her dark hair curling over his pillow. She looked so young lying there, so much younger than when those sharp nails of hers had made the fresh marks on his back.

This thing between him and the pretty girl lying in his bed was so much simpler than the... bloody carnage, was the only thing Jayne could call it... that he'd just seen. Man, in the years he'd known her, he had *never* seen Inara cry, ever. Let alone sob like that. And it hadn't been an easy couple of years on any of them.

Tossing aside his shirt, Jayne moved to the side of his bed, carefully tracing his fingertips along a single curl of her hair lying on his pillow. He'd never hurt River like Mal had just done to Inara. Because they were simpler. Jayne showed River all the fun things about sex that she'd ever want to try. And River...River made his brains leak out his ears with every inch of that beautiful and sensitive little body.

It was sex, great sex, without those messy emotions that had put such pain on Mal and Inara's faces. Sliding his fingers through River's hair, Jayne moved closer, enjoying her warmth against his skin. /Just sex./

"Jayne?" River shifted, the move putting the pads of his fingers against the smooth line of her neck. On its own, his hand flattened against her skin. She felt good.

"Yeah, baby?"

Her silence brought his eyes to hers and that gaze was deep enough that she seemed to be reading the fine print on the back surface of his skull. If there was anything written there, anyway. Without words, River scooted closer to the wall and raised the edge of the blanket in a clear invitation.

The warmth of her skin under his hand made the second of hesitation even shorter before Jayne climbed under the blanket and pulled River into his arms. This was much simpler, skin on skin, the play of fingers through hair and over nerves. /Just sex, just touch./

Jayne's cheek and the fingers of one hand were buried in River's hair when he felt one fingertip roaming slowly over the muscles of his chest. "River?"

"What happened?" The edge of her nail trailed along his collarbone and headed up his throat, hitting nerves all along the way.

"Huh, What?" It took his brain a second or more to separate her words from the touch of her hand.

River lifted her head, touching her fingertips to his forehead and the edge of his face. Her face was puzzled, curious, tilted to the side in a way that was uniquely River. "You are carrying preoccupation and confusion here," Her thumb passed over his forehead "in the semi-voluntary muscles of the brows and eyes." The delicate hand moved back down to his neck and chest, passing over his lips and sending a little jolt through his system. "And here, there is some residual tension in your tendons and muscles." River propped herself up on his chest and looked him carefully in the eyes. "You're not very good at hiding it, Jayne. What happened?"

The slight weight of her sprawled across his chest made his hands itch to pull her closer and ...change the subject. Her hands on the bare skin of his shoulders made the temptation all the stronger. But the weird sinking feeling between his ribs wanted to take her offer to listen. Now, what to say...that was a different matter.

Wrapping his arms around her, Jayne tucked her closer against his chest, enjoying the feel of her as he searched for words. "I... in Inara's shuttle. Mal weren't none too happy to find me there." He ran his fingers through her hair and laughed a little oddly. "I went to get bandages not to get hurt more." There was something...nice, really nice about her patient eyes on his and the quiet touch of her body against his. Those big, brown eyes stayed locked on his as her fingers stroked back and forth over her knife scar on his chest. "I ain't never seem 'em fight like that. The looks on their faces. After Mal left, Inara started cryin' like I ain't never heard no one cry before." Raising one hand to touch the soft line of her cheek, Jayne frowned slightly, feeling a little uncertain as to what he was trying to say. "Her brother's coming, and he might take her home. But I got a bad feeling about all o' this."

A smile quirked those pretty lips, and Jayne momentarily lost his train of thought, but then an eyebrow quirked too, and that expression was always dangerous enough on River to keep his mind on task. "So now you see why I didn't pick Mal for my," She bit her lip, almost distracting him again. "Experiments. The emotional trauma would surely have contaminated my data. If not Mal's emotional guilt, than at the very least Inara's jealousy would make her useless as a research source. And the knowledge from years of being a companion was too much to risk losing." A thoughtful look crossed her eyes, another dangerous expression on River. When she looked like that, Jayne felt an urge to hide some of his possessions. As much as the... endurance... tests had been fun the first few times, getting tied down wasn't his favorite setup and River had a bit of skill with knots and his gun belts. "But her brother could...complicate things."

Suspicion was a part of a smuggler's nature and River had certainly made him more cautious. Randomly getting jumped in dark hallways to test the thrill of being caught, waking up blindfolded, the way she'd touch him in front of her brother, would do that to a man. Jayne never did like the looks the doc still gave him, 'specially when the city boy was holdin' a scalpel. But River with that thoughtful face and talkin' about Inara's brother... somehow bothered Jayne more. "What, River? You afraid of losing Inara's ex-per-tise iffen she goes home?" He pulled her down to his chest, whispering against those pretty lips, "I still got lots to show you that we ain't done yet. So don't you worry your pretty little head over Inara leaving."

She smiled, giving him a small kiss, and somehow it wasn't comforting him in the slightest. "Of course you do, Jayne, I picked you for a reason." The soft touch of her hands stroking up and down his chest was trying to distract him, but self-preservation was stronger ... for a few seconds anyway. Then her nails lightly scratched his shoulders and he almost missed her words. "I doubt Inara will actually leave but the changing group dynamics have the potential to be fascinating."

/Changing... what?/ Change was not what he was looking for right now. Things were perfect just like they were. And it was time to stop his little girl from thinking too much, it always got...complicated when River spent too much time thinking. That's what she'd picked him for anyway, to keep her senses busy. "River," Closing his hands around her narrow waist, Jayne pushed her to her back and pinned her hands to the mattress above her head. "I think you been thinkin' enough today, girl. Let me show you something new." Kissing the smile off her lips, he hooked a hand around her ankle and pressed her knee up against his shoulder. "I just bet you'll love this..." Watching a different kind of interest fill her brown eyes, Jayne smiled with relief, leaning down for another kiss. /Just great sex./

000

River padded on bare feet down one of Serenity's hallways. No matter how many times Simon tried to get her to wear shoes, the metal gratings under the soles of her feet just felt right. Serenity was home. And sneaking around in those combat boots was just not practical. Too much noise. Shoeless was especially good for sneaking up on Jayne, not that he'd run away anymore even if he heard her coming.

But River wasn't looking for Jayne right now. He was still sleeping back in his bunk. A little smile crossed her lips and she stopped at the bend of the hallway, resting a hand against one of the railings. Jayne had tired himself out showing her a couple of her new favorite positions. Tired her out a little too, but there was work to be done. Data to be gathered. Glancing around with a tilt of her head, River headed up the stairs in the cargo bay, moving silently towards the door to Inara's shuttle. One step outside the door, she stopped, listening for the kind of crying Jayne said he heard. But it was quiet on the other side of the door. Was she sleeping? Pressing an ear to the metal, River heard a soft tinkling on the other side. Broken glass...on a metal surface.

Good. Lifting a hand, she hesitated a second before knocking lightly, deliberately lightly on the door. The glass sound stopped and River felt movement through the metal. Knocking a little louder this time, she stood back. Even she couldn't know who Inara would think it was and if the companion was as mad at Mal as she could be...safe distance was a good idea.

"Who is it?" Inara's normally caring voice was oddly cold, but that did make sense. The door opened just enough for one eye to peer out. River, waiting for this, had already lowered her head to look up at her through the fall of her hair, turning one shoulder as if she'd been about to leave. It worked perfectly. Inara reached out a hand to touch her shoulder, her voice changing tone quickly. "Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie, I didn't know it was you. Did you need something, River?"

The arm around her shoulders guided her through the door into the companion's room and River let herself be led to sit on the edge of the bed. "Sit here and I'll be right with you, I just have to finish cleaning up this glass." Inara turned her back and continued sweeping the shards of some colored glass off the edge of her vanity into a metal can. "That's one of the hazards of living on a ship, sometimes your fragile possessions get broken along the way." She turned around with an artificially light tone in her voice and shrug of her shoulders. "Turbulence I guess."

If she remembered correctly (and she did), that particular fragile possession usually sat on the opposite side of the room in the middle of several other breakable objects. No where near the counter it had obviously been thrown against. River listened as the can got set down carefully on top of a nearby table. The sound was heavy, too heavy to hold just the glass from that one painted bottle. Two or three times too heavy, according to her calculations. "Must be turbulence."

Inara squared her shoulders and settled down on the edge of the mattress. "So, River, what was it that you needed?" Her eyes, now up close and visible, were shiny and her makeup didn't quite hide the redness on her eyelids or the new sadness that leaked out of her. She had been crying. Mal had finally made Inara cry. Maybe it was time to help them out a little.

"Jayne says your brother is coming onboard to visit you." The false calmness over Inara's face cracked nearly imperceptibly before it smoothed over. River had to admit she was good at hiding her emotions. Much better than Jayne was.

"Yes, my ... my brother might be coming to see me soon." She looked down, smoothing out the already straight lines of her skirts. "Did, did Jayne tell you anything else?"

Putting a smile on her lips, River laughed softly. "No, he didn't. I don't leave the little mouse with much energy for verbal exchanges."

"Oh, I should think not." A real smile crossed Inara's face. "What was the last thing you asked me about, River, blindfolds? And Jayne's never been that much of a talker to begin with."

The line of her shoulders had relaxed along with the muscles of her face. Best way to gauge a reaction was to separate it from the other ones. Perfect timing.

"What is he like?" River tilted her head and watched the companion

carefully while asking the question.

It was fascinating. Inara's hands flinched slightly then flattened against the fabric of her dress. Her shoulders tightened then lowered, slumping microscopically. "He...oh, you must mean my brother, of course." Relaxing a little, Inara smiled. "We may not have parted on the best of terms, but we were quite close."

"Like me and Simon?" River prompted with a puzzled tone.

"When we were younger, possibly. But I doubt Eamon would have saved me at the cost of getting disowned himself." Inara smiled at her with a hint of sadness. "You were really quite lucky to have Simon for a brother." The expression changed very slightly, now being more ...nostalgic. "It will be interesting to see how he's changed. It's been years since we've seen one

another, I must admit I've missed him."

The brother didn't seem to scare or hurt Inara enough to explain what Jayne said he saw. But what about the rest of the family? "And your parents?"

There was the hurting, in the little half stopped clenching of Inara's hands. It was the parents. /Just like me and Simon./

"I was much closer to my brother than my parents. They ... they led quite ... busy lives and my brother and I spent quite a bit of time together without them." The lines of her arms were apparently relaxed but there was still something in the line of her jaw. Inara was lying. Granted much better than Jayne, but it was still a deceit. It wasn't her parents' distance that she had minded. If they had been distant to her at all. Closeness might have been the issue.

"My parents were... distant too. Gone all the time...some charity banquet or surgeon's conference. But I had Simon." River smiled fondly. "He wanted help with his class work a lot, but he always had time for me even... or especially... when they didn't." That looked like a moment of envy on Inara's face. Definitely too much involvement on the part of her parents, them being gone attracted her. "But we were free to do what we wanted to a lot." That brought on an even bigger response, though still well hidden. What had her parents made her do that she didn't want? Or what had they tried to make her do?

"I'm sure that was ... very nice ... for you and Simon." Almost as if distracting herself from the talk about parents, Inara forcibly smiled. "I wasn't quite the genius as a child that you are River. So my older brother was the one to teach me. Our parents got him fencing lessons for his birthday one year." Suddenly the smile became real. It was a marvel to see the subtle shift from pretended to true emotion on her face. Inara was good. "When Eamon caught me playing with his rapier, I started getting lessons too, from him. It always bothered him if I won...or if I let him win, even though we were very well matched. Men have such fragile egos, even at that age. I wonder if he's still practicing. I haven't had a good fencing match in years."

Avoidance, of course, meant River was getting closer to what she wanted. "Didn't your parents get you lessons too?"

Inara laughed, short and sharp. "Oh, of course. Music and dance and singing. Oh, and I mustn't forget etiquette. From an early age I was trained to lay tables and mingle at social occasions. It was far more ladylike and acceptable than fencing."

"And not as much fun, I'd bet." River turned to see her a little better, tilting her head in the way that worked so well on Simon and Jayne. A 'please tell me more' angle.

"While they all turned out to be useful...despite my change in lifestyle...Fencing with Eamon was far more entertaining at the time. Spending hours every day with my younger sister wasn't a cup of tea," Inara gave a small chuckle. "Even when it was many cups of tea. Pouring them, brewing them, the kinds of cakes and cookies one simply must or must not serve with each kind of tea."

Her voice took on the pattern of an imitation. But whether it was her mother's words or younger sister's, River couldn't tell, maybe both. Inara and her sister got socialite training and their brother got fencing lessons. And at least to her family, Inara's career was a change in lifestyle. Seemed the little sister was the perfect child for the family ambitions. Ambitions that her family wanted Inara to follow as well.

Families could be so narrow minded about their children. And now River knew that meeting Eamon was definitely in the game plan. Any man that would go behind their parents' back to fence with a little sister...could be very useful as an ally, in more than just Inara's situation. "Well, it should be very interesting to meet your brother when he comes. But I should get back to bed now."

"Yes, I'm sure you should. Letting Jayne get more sleep than you do might put some imbalance in you plans for the next few days. Men and their egos." Inara smiled, standing to lead River to the door.

"More like I don't want Simon to go looking for me like he does every once in awhile."

"Brothers can be overprotective at times."

River just smiled and headed down the stairs. /let's hope so. Makes everything easier./

000


	6. Chapter 6

**Hard on the Knees**

**By Gatekeeper and AnitaB**

**Chapter six**

Jayne rolled over still half asleep, one arm reaching out over the sheets. For River. His hand closed around a piece of cold blanket instead of warm skin or curly hair and he woke up. River had left the bed. Glancing out of one eye at the clock, Jayne sort of hazily noticed the time, but it took another minute or two to really sink in. After breakfast. River must've left for breakfast. Which meant... /_Damn, I'm late. Mal's gonna tan my hide./_ Suddenly more wide awake than he'd ever been in his whole life, Jayne threw back the sheets and reached for his pants. Despite evidence to the contrary, he happened to like having his skin on his body and uninjured. River and her nails were just an exception.

Pulling a shirt over his head, Jayne rushed out of the room still carrying his shoes in one hand. He'd been supposed to help Mal empty out one of the smuggling holds in hopes they'd get a big job on the next trip planetside. With his ears still smarting from the lecture that last time he'd been sleeping when he was supposed to be working, Jayne surely did not want to get Mal angry today. 'Specially with the mood he must still be in from the fight with Inara last night.]

Thanks to his initial speed, Jayne's unfortunate meeting with an uneven bit of walkway sent him sailing several feet forward, landing in an undignified tangle at Zoe's feet.

"What's your hurry, Jayne?" She raised an eyebrow. "Believe me, breakfast ain't worth rushing for."

"Mal wanted me to clean out the hidey-holes this morning." Jayne winced, his imminent death looking even worse from this angle. "I ... overslept some."

"Ah." Even a blind man could have seen Mal's mood this morning, but Zoe knew from experience that trying to pry it out of him would only make him dig in deeper. All you could do sometimes was keep the innocents out of the way. Thankfully, Jayne didn't qualify …. "Don't worry Jayne, we'll set you up with a decent funeral." She reached a hand out to help him up, then gave him a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. "I'm sure we could get River to speak for you."

Chuckling, she continued down the corridor, Jayne glaring at her the whole way. "Damn fool people," he muttered under his breath. "Didn't know Wash was catchin'."

"Believe me, he's not the only thing a body can catch around here."

It wasn't fair. It just wasn't damn fair. A man just shouldn't have to stare death in the face this early in the morning, especially when he'd just gone through the same thing the night before. Jayne very, very slowly turned around. "Hey ... hey Mal. I was just getting down ..."

"You were *supposed* to be down there a half-hour ago." The words were chopped, harsh, the clear sign of a man who was looking to do violence to more than just a bit of verbalization. "What the hell were you doin' with yourself?"

"I ... ah ..." For once in his life, Jayne had absolutely no idea how to respond. Normally, he loved talking about sex, especially when it had been him who'd enjoyed it, but even in Jayne's current sleep-deprived state it was clear such conversation wouldn't go over *real* well with Mal at the moment. Besides, he was pretty sure the captain hadn't gotten any in *quite* awhile, and talkin' about a little sheet tusslin' under those circumstances was likely to make the man even crabbier than usual. "Er ..."

"Never mind." Mal held up a hand to stop him, then began stalking down the corridor. "We all know where you were last night."

Since he was heading toward the hidey holes Jayne hurried to catch up with him, even though all good sense was screaming against it. "Sorry, Captain. River doesn't take to quiet real well when she's in the middle of things."

"I don't give a damn what you and River do, just so long as it doesn't interfere with your job."

It took Jayne a minute, not to mention more insight than he usually worried about, but something in Mal's voice finally made him realize he was hinting at something else entirely. "You mean Inara? Hell, no." Relieved that for once it *wasn't* his fault, he rushed to fill in the silence. "Cut out as soon as the hatch was clear. Bein' around a girl cryin' gives me the willies."

Mal stopped short, almost like he'd been jerked back by an unseen hand. Though he refused to look at Jayne, you could see his hands clench. "She was crying?" There was an entirely different edge to his voice, directed in instead of out.

"Well, yeah." Jayne, surprised enough by the captain's sudden stop to have nearly run into him (*not* a good idea, his self-preservation instincts figured out), shrugged. "Wasn't that what you were trying for?"

The temperature in the corridor dropped to nearly fatal levels. "I can think of a *lot* of body parts you don't need to keep doin' your duties, Jayne."

Jayne swallowed, holding his hands up in surrender. "I ain't arguin' with ya, Cap'n, honest. Ya wanna kick a good-lookin' woman off the ship, I ain't sayin' a word against it."

Mal's jaw tightened, but he still wouldn't look Jayne in the eye. "I am *not* kicking her off my ship," he said through clenched teeth. "I've got no say over her comings and goings."

Jayne snorted. "But ya want to, don't ya? Even *I've* managed to figger out ya want her, and she sure as hell don't look at the rest of us the way she looks at you. Even my guns don't get that kind of appreciation."

One quick move later and Mal had Jayne slammed up against the corridor wall. "That parts list is addin' up, Jayne. I'm sure Simon's itchin' to give me a hand."

"I got ya, Cap'n. I got ya." The voice seemed to have a sufficient amount of healthy fear in it, but when Mal's grip had finally eased Jayne let out a long-suffering sigh. "Look, we don' know what the deal is with you two, but if ya'd just grab each other and start knockin' boots it'd be a sight easier on the rest of us."

The moment of shock that followed was all that Jayne needed to make his escape, leaving Mal to vent his frustration on the wall instead of his crew member of choice.

"I hate to say it, but Jayne may have a point."

Mal sighed, running a hand down his face. "Ain't that supposed to be a sign of the end of the 'verse, Shepherd?"

Seeing that the other man was going to refrain from biting for the moment, Book stepped forward. "So I always thought, Captain. But this is a very specific situation."

Mal turned, some of the steel back in his voice. "I can't see you suggestin' fornication, Shepherd."

"Well, no." Book tipped his head slightly, carefully choosing his words. The truth had become far more … complicated since he'd taken to the skies. "Jayne's phrasing was indeed a bit rougher than I would have used, but the basic message was a sound one. Tell her how you feel."

Mal's eyes narrowed. "You think I'm hard to deal with now, Shepherd? Try to imagine the situation if I'd followed your advice and she still ended up leavin'."

Book put a compassionate hand on the other man's shoulder. "Have you considered the fact that she might stay?"

Mal's gesture took in far more of him than it did the ship. "Not for this."

Then he was gone.

000

Tracy Kingman, trust fund child and long-time physical baggage of the Serra family, stared out the window of their aircar in horror. "*That's* the ship we'll be taking?"

"It would be rather difficult to conduct 'business' otherwise," Eamon Serra, family heir and puppet of choice, clipped out. "That's the ship Inara's been flying on." He, too, looked out the window with a careful nonchalance, taking in the lines of the ship that Inara had fought so hard to remain with. The ship it now seemed she wanted just as badly to leave.

Tracy's nose wrinkled in disgust as they pulled up to the private landing bay. The family hadn't wanted anyone else to see them associate with such … lower class individuals. "The poor girl must have lost her mind. When I …."

Eamon's hand came down hard against the other man's knee, cutting him off. "You will say *nothing* of that matter until I do, agreed?" Of course, Eamon hadn't specified when *he* would have to say something. "And if she has lost her mind, you should be grateful. She'll no doubt get along much better with you."

Before Tracy could respond, the door opened. "We're here, sirs." Beyond the driver, Eamon caught his first look at the people with whom he would be spending the next handful of weeks.

000

He was perfect. It was a pity he was so … unsuitable a test subject.

River leaned farther out over the edge of the catwalk, the better to study the first of her new variables as he emerged from the vehicle. Visually, he was an excellent specimen, carrying enough of his sister's genes to produce a similar effect. His mind, though, was the true attraction, sharp and so full of contradictions and secrets that it was nearly worth an experiment on its own. Unfortunately, though, it could not her current one.

Still, that sharpness could provide a much needed catalyst in other areas. He knew of the tangle that connected his sister to the captain, and while he couldn't yet sense the game in it his clear willingness to manipulate whatever rules necessary appealed to her. He merely needed guidance ….

And a removal of that distraction. The second variable to emerge had a mind like the grating beneath her feet, unable to retain even the most basic of thought processes. He would spill the other man's secrets like blood from an abdominal wound, damaging her scenario before it was even begun.

But other plans …. His physical appearance confirmed even more closely to human algorithms of beauty than did Inara's brother, aided by a few subtle pheromone treatments. And, though his mind and chest were far emptier than Jayne's, hollow instead of simple, he had many other … skills to be brought to the equation that it would not even occur to her lover to match.

What a *fascinating* interplay that would be ….

Her mouth was just beginning to curve into a smile when Wash's voice suddenly appeared in her pocket. "Are they here yet, River?"

River eased back from the edge to answer the communicator, knowing that even now the others did not quite trust her balance. "They have arrived. The captain will no doubt be barking at you to fly as soon as he has finished glaring them into submission."

"So, should we be hiding in terror or selling tickets? We've got a pool going, and I want your expert analysis before I place my bet."

Her gaze swept over the scene beneath her, mentally time elapsed them along the necessary logarithms. "There is a 97.532 percent probability that both will occur over the duration. Make sure there is room in the hiding places for ticket customers."

There was a pause as Wash digested this. "You always know just how to reassure a guy …"

000

They wanted him dead.

Correction. Only Captain Reynolds, standing at the top of the ship's ramp and sporting a glare that should have cut through metal, *truly* wanted him dead. At the moment, though, this wasn't a problem – their earlier conversation had given him some warning of this, and since Eamon suspected he was the one who had put such pain in his little sister's voice he wasn't too happy with the captain either.

The hulking man *might* want them dead any moment now, but only if the girl on the catwalk continued to look at Tracy as she was, like he was a particularly intriguing little bird and she had just grown whiskers. The imposing-looking woman, fortunately, seemed intent on *avoiding* any unnecessary deaths, a fact for which he found himself suddenly grateful.

Depending, of course, on her definition of unnecessary ….

As for Inara, well … she loved him, a claim he could make about no one else. Her face warmed as she saw him emerge, and dignity quietly stepped aside as he held his arms out. "It's been too long, little sister."

"I've missed you, Eamon," she responded as they embraced. "You look wonderful."

"You've stolen my line," he said softly, pulling back slightly to get a better look at her face. "And your smile has seemed to follow it as well."

"I …." Her eyes widened in alarm as she caught sight of something over his shoulder. "You chose *Tracy* to accompany you?"

Eamon only had time to mutter the words "family decree" before Tracy was upon them. "Innie, girl, you look *fantastic.* Amazing how you can find the necessary fripperies out in this wasteland." Inara accepted the pest's lips smacking against her cheek with her usual dignity and grace, but Eamon could see the flinch in her eyes.

"What, ain't willin to dirty their minds by meetin' the rest of us folk?"

The captain's words pulled the flinch all the way onto her face, and she closed her eyes a moment to collect herself before she turned around. "Then it's already too late for him, isn't it? He's met you." Then she sighed, and Eamon could feel the sound stab at his heart. "Eamon, this is Captain Reynolds, though you've already met him when you made the arrangements." She gestured to each individual in turn. "Zoe Warren, Jayne Cobb …." Her voice stuck in her throat as the girl from the catwalk suddenly approached. "Sweetie, I don't think …."

"Don't worry, Inara, Brother will not spoil the game – he shares more than blood with you." Her smile was full of secret knowing as she shook his hand. "Wants a hand in another game of ours, seeks the queen's secrets in order to protect her. Your will is sharp, but old choices have left you with a poor choice in pawn, Mr. Serra. He leaks the player's thoughts, will spoil your moves before you have a chance to make them." She smiled slightly as she trailed a finger down Tracy's arm, watching his interest perk. "Though he *is* a very fine specimen."

"You've got plenty on your plate already, girl," Captain Reynolds cut in, using what was no doubt his command voice. "Jayne, why don't you take her inside and see if you can keep her from making any more friends."

"No problem, Cap'n," Jayne growled, throwing the girl over his shoulder as he glared at them both. After he turned his back, though, the girl winked back at them both. Tracy, idiot that he was, was foolish enough to wink back.

Which reminded him ….

"This is Tracy Kingman." Eamon smoothly finished the introductions as if nothing unusual had happened, a habit useful in the eccentricities of high society. "He's …."

Tracy, unfortunately, considered this is cue. "Pleased to meet you, Mr. Reynolds," he said, grabbing the captain's hand and pumping it with no notice of the insult or how little he clearly valued his life.

Mal shot Eamon a weighty look. "Doesn't look much like family," he said, the tone clearly implying that Tracy had better discover a connection *fast* if he wanted to keep his hand attached.

Tracy, oblivious as always, missed this entirely. "Of course not," he said disgustedly, then gave the captain a leering wink. "I'll eventually be a bit … closer than that, if you catch my drift."

It was as if they'd all been slapped at once. There was a few moments of sheer astonishment from everyone involved, then the temperature dropped to a distinctly sub-zero level. Inara made the first move, jerking away from her brother in pained astonishment as her eyes narrowed at the sign of this new betrayal. Zoe tensed, ready in case shooting should occur.

Eamon swore fluently in the confines of his skull, once again wishing he'd done the sensible thing and kept the other man sedated for the duration of the trip. Just because his father had insisted he come along didn't mean he actually had to be *conscious* ….

Mal, for his part, merely lifted a brightly enquiring eyebrow. Only a grimace of pain from Tracy gave any indication of the death grip Mal had on the other man's hand. "Come again?"

"Well …I …" The arrows of pain shooting up his right arm cluing him in to the fact that he'd made a gaffe of some kind (and realizing that nothing short of major surgery was going to get him free, Tracy attempted to correct the situation. However, since he had no natural self-preservation to fall back on and being unable to see Eamon's range of threatening facial expressions, it didn't work too well. "I'm In … ack … Inara's … ow …."

"*Yes*?"

"Tracy," Eamon began, every threat of death he could imagine in his voice, "if you do not stop speaking at *once* …."

Inara's glare cut him off. "Let the man finish, *brother.*"

Tracy, however, was beyond either of them. "… fianc ... AAAHHHH!"

000


	7. Chapter 7

Hard on the Knees

By Gatekeeper and AnitaB

Chapter 7

"Are you *sure* it wasn't Jayne Cobb who did this? A large man, enjoys glaring at people?" Simon paused in his gentle examination of his patient's hand, eyebrows drawing together as he reconsidered. "Of course, lately that's been a pretty accurate description of the Captain as well …."

"He was introduced to me as Captain Reynolds." Tracy glared at the doctor in between dramatic expressions of pain. "Are you daring to call me a liar?"

"Of course not. I'm just trying to make an … accurate assessment." Simon dreaded the thought of using one of his precious few remaining sealants on the man, particularly if he would be requiring another within a few days. Inspiring this level of violence in the Captain took a considerable amount of arrogant stupidity, and men prone to that tended to make it a habit …. "I take it you're also the reason the captain has decided to stay landlocked longer than he had originally intended. Did you pull a weapon on him … no, they would have just pulled theirs. Did you insult the ship? The crew?" Simon's eyes narrowed as a thought hit him. "If you've done anything to Kaylee …."

"I assure you, I've never even met the woman." Tracy had no idea what the name of the fetching creature who had accosted Eamon had been, but the glint the doctor was getting in his eye appeared frighteningly similar to the one that Reynolds had been sporting during what he was now thinking of as the 'incident.' "I was simply attempting to answer a question the oaf had asked me about Innie."

"Innie?" Simon asked, appalled. "Well, that explains the situation right there. We might as well dump you out a hatch now, save the drain you'll be on my supplies." As his patient's eyes widened in horror, the doctor shook his head. "Don't worry, Mr. Kingman. I wasn't serious." It wasn't until he crossed the room for supplies that he added under his breath, "At least, not at the moment …."

Then even muttered asides were interrupted as he caught sight of Kaylee through the open door. "Doc, Zoe stopped by the engine room after Inara's …" She glanced inside the medical bay, shot a brief look of disgust at the embarrassingly bad leer Tracy was attempting in her direction. "Can ya come out here for a sec?"

Sensing the urgency in his lover's voice and knowing the shot he'd already administered would take care of his patient's pain, Simon stepped outside and shut the door. A few minutes later he was back inside, a very … set expression on his face.

"The injury's not as bad as it looks. I'm going to wait and see how well it heals on its own." Simon grabbed Tracy's hand at just the right point to make the other man's face contort. Even pain medication, Simon knew, had its weak spots. "So, Kaylee tells me you've met my sister …."

000

It was certainly a new way to see one of her favorite parts of Jayne. His broad shoulders and sculpted back hung inverted before her yes, a side effect of being dangled upside down over his shoulder to be sure, but a lovely view all the same. And his arm, placed firmly across the backs of her thighs, pressed the hard muscles of his chest against her knees. All in all, River was fully enjoying being carted out of the cargo bay. It just wouldn't be good to let Jayne know that.

"Jayne, don't." Pushing deliberately weakly against his back, River smiled at his arm tightening around her knees. "Release me, you unevolved ape man."

"Gorramit, River." Jayne's shoulder moved under her stomach. Her feet touched the metal rating an instant before the back surface of her entire body was pressed none too gently against the wall. Big hands closed around her wrists and pinned them above her head. River closed her eyes and bit her lip to keep pleasure off her face and a groan below her throat. Tracy was already proving more than satisfactory in provoking such... enjoyable... reactions from Jayne. "What in the ruttin' hell is going through that genius brain of yours?"

True intentions could not be exposed so early. All her plans might go south. Ignorance was the strategy for the hour. "Jayne, you're not making sense."

His body pressed hard along hers, his hands still trapping hers. Muscles all over River's body obeyed the heat of his skin and not her brain, shivering helplessly. "How's this fer sense, girl. Whatever you're thinking of with that walkin' dead man... don't" Jayne switched both her wrists into one hand, leaning harder against her in the process. "Ain't no man ever gonna make you feel like me. Ain't no one gonna know your body like me. Ev'ry nerve, ev'ry line." The very tip of his finger moved in a deceptively light stroke down the line of her neck, setting her trembling in its wake. "Ain't nobody gonna make your body feel so good as me."

Full blown Jealousy at one touch and a wink to Tracy. Something inside River just glowed at the growl in his voice and the possessiveness in his touch. Jayne just felt so good pressing so tight against her, wrapping her in the fierce strength of his body. With more effort than was pretty, River kept most of the instinctual reaction off her face and gave Jayne only slightly warm eyes. "It's only science, Jayne."

Time froze for a long, drawn out moment, then shattered. "Science!" Jayne released her hands and lifted her bodily into his arms for a bruising assault of a kiss. River's legs wound themselves naturally around his waist as she helplessly opened her mouth to his. Big hands tightened flat against her back, bending her body to the lines of his. The nearly painful pressure inside her ribs was followed by the hard press of Jayne's erection between her legs, both forcing a breathless sound from her throat. "I'll give you science, girl. I'll give you science 'til you can't breathe or walk straight."

000

The sabers clanged with a far more violent sound than the little strips of metal seemed capable of. The echo in the cargo hold, unfortunately, did little to tame the effect.

"Your footwork's terrible, Eamon." Inara's voice was utterly cool, completely at odds with the spark in her eye that still promised death. "Haven't you been practicing?"

"Forgive me, dear sister. Fear for my life has always had a detrimental effect on my memory." Eamon danced backwards, certain now that fencing blades had not been the wisest choice of gift when Inara had left for the Academy. Though they had, naturally, been safety tipped, he suspected that fact would do little to stop her. "Can we perhaps have a seat somewhere and discuss this in a civilized manner?"

Inara snapped her blade around, catching Eamon smartly on the shoulder. "You were less interested in discussion earlier, when you were trying to drag me into one of Father's plans without a word of warning."

Indignation gave him a brief advantage, and he took it with a slash across her lower arm. "You know perfectly well that's not what I intended."

Inara stepped neatly away from his next thrust, arching an eyebrow. "Do I?"

He caught her blade on a sideswing, forcing it down to the ground and covering half the distance between them. "If I hadn't agreed to let that idiot Tracy accompany me, Father would never have arranged the visit without asking a number of inconvenient questions. And as you had already made completely clear, I would have to track you down in person before you would finally tell me what was wrong!"

From the stairs Kaylee's voice cut into the sudden silence. "Inara, Doc asks that you don't try and kill either of 'em till he gets more supplies." Then for Eamon came that angry, defensive glare he'd already seen from so many people during his brief time on board. "Least unless you're real sure you want 'em to stay that way."

"Thank you, Kaylee." The warmth in his sister's voice was evident. The sadness, he suspected, was harder to discern. "I'll do my best to remember that."

Or maybe not. At Inara's response Kaylee took another step down the stairs, concern radiating from her entire being. Was he the only one leery of his sister when she was furious and holding a weapon? "It'll be okay, Nara, really. Families can just get a little … stupid, sometimes."

"I'll be fine. Eamon and I were just …" Inara briefly met his eyes. "… discussing a few things."

Kaylee shot another dubious look at Eamon before heading back up the stairs. "I'll be in the engine room if you need me."

When she was safely gone Eamon raised an eyebrow. "Why am I the villain here? When we last spoke you seemed inexplicably tempted by the thought of leaving this place."

Expression suddenly fierce, Inara jerked her sword upward and out of its prison. "At the cost of letting that idiot touch me? I'd rather die."

"An incredibly sensible opinion, and one I'm not about to argue against." Step back, block, jab, block, step back. "You know that I could help facilitate other arrangements, though, if you truly wish to leave."

At this, she faltered slightly, her saber work and voice both suddenly hesitant for a moment. "It is fruitless to stay where one is no longer wanted."

Eamon stopped completely, eyes widened with surprise. "No longer wanted? That sweet-looking girl appeared nearly ready to slit my throat at the very thought that I might be causing you distress."

Inara's eyes flickered downward. "Kaylee … is not the only person on the ship."

Ah. Of course, after the scene they had all played through out on the ramp, new shadings had served to color old suspicions. "Would this other person of which you speak happen to be Captain Reynolds?"

At this Inara met his gaze, defiant in her composure. "The Captain now feels that the burdens of having me aboard outweigh the advantages."

Eamon leaned forward slightly, expression kindly enquiring. "And yet this same captain nearly shatters the hand of our idiot Tracy at the thought of him taking you away from all this …."

She lunged suddenly, precise enough that if Eamon hadn't spun out of the way an eye would have been in serious jeopardy. "He's *your* Tracy, not mine, and I go when and where and with whom I *choose.*"

Eamon swung upward to block her next attack, the sabers clanging even louder than before. "I notice you have yet to address the issue of the hand crushing."

"He …" She stopped, lips pressed together. "He must have felt his ego was being attacked in some way."

"Naturally." It never failed to amaze him how one man could so badly damage his normally astute sister's perceptions. Now that he suspected the captain was suffering under the same malady, Eamon took it as a positive sign. Strong emotions could be such … distracting things, sometimes. "It's not as if you haven't given him plenty of experience with that particular emotion."

She glared. "Believe me, I've been dealt plenty of the same."

Eamon nodded his head in acknowledgement. "It's a common habit when one fears a person is getting too close emotionally." He just grinned as the next thrust caught him square the chest. If he thought he was in danger before …. "Now, my dear sister, let us test *your* footwork …."

000

The captain was sitting in the pilot's seat, staring out the front windows. Wash couldn't see his expression, but he'd guess it was the same pleasant salesman's face Zoe said he'd been wearing ever since their new passengers had come on board. The wrongness of it was practically beyond description.

Wash looked over at his wife, for once keeping his voice low. "Is this why people used to be afraid of clowns?"

Zoe sighed. She'd only seen the captain like this once before, and by the time *that* was over the man's spine had been broken in three places. "Not unless they were armed, dear."

"Well, I ain't armed, and I reckon the only clowns around here are the ones on my ship." Mal swiveled around to face them. "So what seems to be the trouble?"

Wash knew that he would be accused of sarcasm later, but for once his response was the simple truth. "We're deathly afraid of you, sir." 

Zoe shot her husband a quelling look before turning back to the captain. "What he means, sir, is we're wondering why you haven't broken anything else yet." She hadn't been by to talk to the doc yet, but from the expression on Mr. Kingman's face she doubted his hand was in too good a shape.

"Nothin' needs breakin'." The captain's voice sounded like it was straining to hold back the entire verse, and Wash winced when Mal flipped a switch with a more than healthy amount of intent. His beloved switches …. "Inara's family troubles ain't my concern."

"Uh huh, sir." Zoe eyed Mal carefully. Luckily, you didn't have to worry about guns so much when he got like this, but it was best to keep him away from blunt objects. "You did see how Inara reacted to Mr. Kingman's news, didn't you?"

"I got eyes, don't I?" Mal's pretense at calm was slipping, but no one felt it was wise to mention that fact.

"Just checking, sir." Zoe's voice was almost painfully bland.

Wash, fear of death aside, couldn't help but contribute. "Inara's also trying to kill her brother down in the cargo bay, if you want to go watch. The seating is good, but cheering tends to make them gesture violently at the audience …." A discreet elbow from Zoe inspired him to momentary silence.

Since Mal seemed to have no intention of filling that silence, Zoe tried again. "They ambushed her, sir."

"No." Mal flipped another switch, forcefully enough that Wash was sure he'd heard it crack. Was it appropriately manly to give one's life for one's control system? "Just gave her a different place to run to."

Zoe lifted an eyebrow. "Inara doesn't seem the type to run away, sir."

Desperate to distract himself from the possible carnage, Wash moved close enough to whisper in his wife's ear. "Yes, but has she ever faced Mal, the clown of terror before?" Then he mimed being elbowed in the side before once again falling silent. Never hurt to keep an eye on the exit, though ….

"Ain't nothin' here worth stayin' for." Some of the pressure in Mal's voice had vanished, replaced by emptiness. Depressing, sure, but at least Serenity would be safer.

Zoe, remembering some of the captain and Inara's fights, nodded gravely. "You've certainly seen to that, sir."

Wash winced as the words left her mouth, able to see the arms of the chair practically warp under the captain's hands. If he got his hands back on the controls …. He glanced quickly at his wife. He was almost positive she loved him enough to follow them and save his life, especially since it was really all her fault in the first place. "Oh, I don't think any guy does it *intentionally,* Zoe," he said quickly as he began backing up. "But if you need some help in that particular area, Captain, I picked up a book on Osiris with some *wonderful* illustrations …."

Then he was off down the hallway, Mal only moments behind and Zoe only moments behind him. The relief he was feeling was probably entirely inappropriate.

000


End file.
